Hi, my name is Julie. I have rededicated this website to try to help others going through what I experienced as a survivor of narcissistic abuse.
After seven years of an on-again/off-again relationship, God gave me the strength to walk away for good. I never could have done it without Him. It was a painful process, learning to sit in the pain and experience the pain instead of running back to or welcoming back my abuser. But I, with God’s help, was able to hold my ground and was finally done.
What I had not anticipated was that once I was finally out of the relationship, I had no idea who I was anymore. My former boyfriend had slowly, over the seven years we were together, erased me. Anyone who knew me before I met him, would tell you that music was a big part of my life. I loved music. I listened to it all the time and of course I had my favorites. However, in the seven years he and I were together, we only listened to his music. That was it. And while I can think of one band we both liked, his favorite type of music was not mine.
Music was not the only thing that I enjoyed that was erased. The list was long, but included hobbies, reading, my creative and artistic endeavors and on and on.
So, once the relationship was finally over, I had no idea who I was…at all. I felt lost. I remember doing spring cleaning after it was over and I came across one of my Dan Fogelberg CD’s. It had always been a favorite of mine. I held it in my hands, staring at it. And memories started to come back. I put in one of the CD’s (it’s a double set) and listened to the songs. Tears made their way down my face. I had forgotten how beautiful the music and lyrics were.
And that was the beginning of my journey back to myself. Am I the same person I was before I met my ex? No. I will never be her again. But I have a better sense of who I am, what I like, what I will tolerate and what I absolutely will not tolerate. Much like the Six Million Dollar Man (70’s reference), I am better and stronger. I would like to help you become better and stronger too by finding your way back to you. And that is why I am creating this website. I hope you will follow along.